4/28/2025*
hii. 👋
in the past few days, i've felt a little bit like i'm losing the plot and i can't discern if it's because of everything else or in my life or because of the lack of effort i've put recently into this blog or both! so i've decided to actually do that challenge that i mentioned a few days back. here we go:
- Why did you make a blog in the first place?
before the new year, i was dealing with these feelings of like. uselessness? kind of a stagnant phase that had gone on for years. i think it was only exacerbated by that i wasn't doing too hot and couldn't stop thinking of reaching out to an old partner (using this very loosely). our relationship (also very loose) was sort of just for. i guess like an online fwb type thing, for lack of a better word. but it was important to me and i very much liked the person and i'm sure it was mutual. it sort of exploded after one of my old acquaintances said something negative to him and he thought that was my opinion, too. after that, he said that he would prefer if there were no feelings involved but we just kept up the videochatting aspect. obviously i said no, and we just stopped talking. this had to have been in 2019? i was 23 and he was a few years younger. fast forward to maybe 2023, i spoke to an old friend of both of us and they briefly mentioned that he felt bad. i am not someone who takes things lightly and these words kind of shaped my feelings for a few months. between real life arguments with my mom and the loss of too many people, all i could think of was reaching out again. i decided that it'd be beneficial for me to try to write my feelings out, rather than keeping them locked away and probably behaving in an unhealthy manner. i do still want to speak to him, but i'm doing much better!
- Why did you choose Bear Blog?
it seemed very simple and no frills. i don't want to get too deep into the customization part of it and lose focus so i've forced myself not to touch that part of it. i like the simplicity.
- Have you blogged on other platforms before?
no, this is my first ever foray into online blogging. i previously tried journaling but it's much easier to keep this up.
- Do you write your posts directly in the editor or in another software?
all of my entries are typed directly into the editor, yes. i don't want to overthink anything, so i try to cut anything extra out of the process.
- When do you feel most inspired to write?
i've almost always got something on my mind that i want to write down. lately, my published entries have seemed kind of stagnant, i'm sure, but because i feel a bit weird oversharing at the moment. i don't typically care, not anymore, and i'm sure i'll be back to it soon. i know that everything i post has probably seemed uninspired.
- Your favourite post on your blog?
i don't have one because i don't think of any specific entry for too long after i post it. instead, i'll say that i really enjoy reading these specific people: bear.borb, vics.me, zoeloukia, tiramisu (ultimate favorite), and some others.
- Any future plans for your blog?
i plan to (hopefully) keep writing for the entire year and after that, i'm unsure! i'll see how i feel.
that's all i've got! thank you for reading this, if you did.
see you tomorrow! 👩❤️💋👩